The Pleasure of Goodbye

I just realized that I don't miss them. You know, all the people that were strategically removed because of their toxicity or negativity. I just realized that I do not miss them.  

At the end of each year, I spend time reflecting on the months prior. In years past, my reflections revealed typically one or two people lingering on the list, awaiting the boot. The unfortunate fact is, they often didn't know it. So, as 2010 ended, I embarked upon my usual 3-4 day reflection. I used this time to evaluate myself (one must always start with self), evaluate the status of my long-term goals, and to assess current relationships. The conclusion... 2010 was a year of purging. Negative relationships were released, poor habits were evicted and for the small thinkers...security was summonsed.

Last year was filled with pitfalls and victories. Some of my most fervent prayers were answered after years of conversations with God. Though my victories came at a high price, I am grateful for the experience. Nevertheless, what became most apparent during my reflections was that a couple of relationships that were very dear to me ended in 2010. One was a friendship of over 20 years and the other a friendship with a prior love interest. Both of them were people that I shared some of happiest moments of my life. However, their time had expired. Simple as that. Their placement in my life was no longer beneficial. More importantly, my placement in their life lacked purpose.  

Often, we tend to hold on to people (or things) that we deem necessary or important. Yet, we fail to realize that the very thing that we are holding on to may be a barrier to our full potential. For this reason, we must always remain aware of patterns of behavior. As the saying goes, "When someone shows you who they are, believe them". Don't misunderstand me; I am not suggesting that we keep a tally of the wrongs or inefficiencies of others. None of us are in a position to keep such a record.  Instead, I am suggesting that one must become relentless about removing, rearranging, restructuring or revising anything that stands between them and the fulfillment of purpose in this life.  

I still love the people that I had to remove. I honor the season that they occupied. However, the truth is, people change. Sometimes, they change in a way that is not conducive to your current season. If they remain they will indeed become distractions. There is value in loving someone from a distance.

So, for now....Au revoir ma chère.


What do you need to let go of today? I'd love to hear your thoughts via email or comments. There's freedom in open expression.


Next up: Monday Morning Musings